got this in my email and loved it. As someone who's not overly fond of dogs (still a little leery of anything than barks and bites) the first one is my most favorite.
Apparently these are excerpts from some UK classifieds:
You have to appreciate British humor!
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old.
Hateful little bastard.
1/2 Cocker Spaniel.
1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog.
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 GAY bull for sale.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.
Worn once by mistake.
**** And the WINNER is… ****
FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer.
No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.
And by the way: Statement of the Century
From the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker, Billy Connolly:
"If women are so bloody perfect at multi-tasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"